Assertiveness Blog Posts

Write A Letter. I'll Feel Better.

 On April 12 of 2016, there was a hailstorm of epic proportions in San Antonio and the surrounding areas.  And when I say epic, I mean downright frightening.  Every thud on the roof sounded as if it would break right through the att...

Ten Signs That You Had A Narcissistic Mother

I had a narcissistic mother and it was a complete disaster for my boyhood sense of self-confidence and the way I saw myself as I grew into a man. A narcissistic mother can leave deep emotional and psychological wounds that get triggered in our daily...
by The Confident Man Project on Jan 4, 2017

How To Put Your Mother In Her Rightful Place

I was visiting my parent's place on the weekend and seeing some relatives from interstate who I don't often get the chance to hang out with. At one point we were all sitting in the lounge room listening to my father describe the apocalyptic nightmare...
by The Confident Man Project on Dec 22, 2016

Do You Feel Guilty About Being Angry With Your Parents?

I grew up in a family where emotions weren't expressed cleanly; especially challenging emotions like anger. Everyone feels angry from time to time, but growing up I got the sense that there was something wrong with this basic human emotion because no...
by The Confident Man Project on Nov 28, 2016

How To Heal Your Mother Issues

Many men have mother issues that undermine our self-confidence by stopping us from really growing up and fulfilling our true potential. Unresolved mother issues cause us to remain emotionally and developmentally immature; a boy in a man's body. If w...
by The Confident Man Project on Nov 27, 2016

Overcoming The Fear Of Being Assertive With Strangers

I want to share with you a recent victory I had over the fear of being assertive with strangers, and why it's so significant for me. A few days ago I was sitting on a bench seat in a popular park down by the beach near where I live, reading a book wr...
by The Confident Man Project on Oct 31, 2016

How To Turn Your Anger Into Assertiveness

I've noticed a consistent pattern among myself and my coaching clients: we all have a history of not standing up for ourselves when other people behave in ways that we don't feel good to us. Most of us had parents who weren't willing or able to teach...
by The Confident Man Project on Sep 6, 2016

Romance In Action: Learn Assertiveness Skills to Improve Your Relationship

Read ‘Assertiveness: A Journey Worth Taking’ to explore how to better assert your rights whilst also protecting your partners rights in future – remember true assertiveness is not about winning, it’s about finding a mutually agreeable comprom...
by Accessible Psychology on Aug 18, 2016

Romance In Action: Discover What Rights Have Been Violated

Read ‘How to free yourself and assert your rights’. List if any of the rights covered in the article either you have violated to your partner or they have violated to you. It’s important to be honest so that you can then think of ways, invariab...
by Accessible Psychology on Aug 17, 2016

How To Recover From Childhood Bullying

I was bullied mercilessly at my all boys high school. Turning up to Year 8 English class was a routine nightmare: Often one boy in the class would stake out the door waiting for the teacher while another group would hoist me up on top of a high cupbo...
by The Confident Man Project on Aug 4, 2016

How To Overcome The Fear Of Conflict

I developed an intense fear of conflict when I was young, and it has hung around with me for a long time. The fear evolved as a series of things led to each other: I used to find the fights between my parents very frightening as a kid, and never expe...
by The Confident Man Project on Jun 26, 2016

How To Deal With Angry Women

I get my fair share of hate mail on the Internet, which I find unpleasant but not entirely surprisingly. Many people aren't good at expressing their anger cleanly, and some of them choose to channel it into hate mail directed at me. Being on the rece...
by The Confident Man Project on Feb 21, 2016

How To Manage Anger Constructively

I grew up in a home where anger wasn't handled well. Let me take you back there: Do Other People Push Your Anger Button? Now, don't get me wrong. My mother lets her anger flow freely, but she rarely uses the actual words "I am angry". Instead, her...
by The Confident Man Project on Apr 14, 2015

Learn To Say "No"

Hey, it's Graham here again and today I want to teach you about learning to say no. This is a basic assertiveness skill that a lot of guys like myself who are recovering nice guys tend to struggle with. It's the whole being able to say no when other...
by The Confident Man Project on Mar 22, 2015

How To Ask Your Boss For A Raise

Hey there, it's Graham from The Confident Man Project with an idea for you and here's something I never had the guts to do back before I worked for myself, but that's okay. I can still suggest it. You might want to do it. And that is to be able to go...
by The Confident Man Project on Mar 20, 2015

Let Other People Get Out Of Your Way

Hey, it's Graham here again from The Confident Man Project, and you're about to learn another fun way of building your self-confidence. And today what I want to talk about is letting other people get out of your way. I first came across this concept...
by The Confident Man Project on Mar 18, 2015

How To Handle A Boyfriend Or Husband With A Controlling Mother: Part 2

The solution to this whole issue is for the man to man up and start stand up to his mother and saying what's important to him whenever there's some kind of conflict so that he can learn to side with you in the relationship rather than with his contro...
by The Confident Man Project on Feb 26, 2015

How To Handle A Boyfriend Or Husband With A Controlling Mother: Part 1

Most of my advice is aimed at men, but today I have a video for you ladies out there on the topic of how to deal with a man who has a controlling mother. I've written a previous article on how to deal with a controlling mother, and I'm getting an inc...
by The Confident Man Project on Feb 24, 2015

The Day I Finally Stood Up To My Critical Mother

My mother and father are still together after 50 years of marriage. They are good, church going people who are very community minded. They show love by acts of service and are often kind and generous to other people. But the way my critical mother tr...
by The Confident Man Project on Feb 18, 2015

10 Signs Your Family Is Crazy-Making

One of my mentors once described families like the one I grew up in as crazy-making. I thought, “Wow, that’s a fantastic description.” Take a perfectly normal infant child, bring them up in a crazy-making family and you’ve pretty much got a r...
by The Confident Man Project on Feb 14, 2015
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